Rwanda: Byinshi wibaza ku guca Imyeyo

Guca imyeyo cyangwa se gukuna, ni umuco washinze imizi mu Rwanda kugeza n’aho umukobwa washyingirwaga atarabikoze yasendwaga n’umugabo ku mugaragaro.

Abanyarwanda bemeraga ko gukuna bituma abashakanye baryoherwa n’imibonano mpuzabitsina, mu gihe utarabikoze atashoboraga gushimisha umugabo we.

Iyi myemerere n’ubu iracyahari mu Rwanda rw’ubu, n’ubwo iby’umuco bigenda bivangirwa n’iterambere.

Abantu benshi cyane cyane abakiri bato, bibaza niba ibivugwa ku muco wo gukuna ari byo, niba bikenewe koko, cyangwa se niba ari cyo gicumbi cy’ibyishimo mu mibonano mpuzabitsina.

Dushimimana Marie Anne yaganiriye na Dr Patana Mulisanze, impuguke mu buvuzi bw’indwara zo mu mutwe n’izo mu myitwarire n’imitekerereze (psychiatrie et psychotherapie), akaba n’impuguke mu buganga bujyanye n’ibitsina (sexuologie Clinique), maze atangaza byinshi ku muco wo gukuna.

Mbese iyo umukobwa aciye imyeyo, mu by’ukuri aba akoze iki ku mubiri we?

Guca imyeyo ni ugukurura les petites lèvres z’umwanya ndangagitsina w’abagore (imishino). Bamwe bakoresha amavuta y’inka abandi bagakoresha andi mavuta ariko bavanzemo ubundi bwoko bw’ibyatsi n’ibimera nk’intobo n’ibindi.

Ese koko ni byo ko guca imyeyo byongera ibyishimo mu mibonano mpuzabitsina ku mpande zombi?

Nta bushakashatsi bwimbitse bwakozwe mu Rwanda ku bijyanye n’ibyishimo byaturuka ku kuba umugore yaraciye imyeyo, bitagirwa n’utarayiciye.

Umushakashatsi witwa Michela Fusaschi yaganiriye n’Abanyarwandakazi b’ingeri zitandukanye ku gukuna, abamuhaye ubuhamya biganjemo abaciye imyeyo barabihamya ariko nta bisobanuro bifatika biri scientifiques bishobora kubihamya

Bivugwa ko guca imyeyo bituma umukobwa cyangwa se umugore agira ububobere n’amazi menshi, mu by’ukuri ni cyo kibitera?

Ntago ari byo. Mu bihugu bitagira umuco wo guca imyeyo, abagore baho na bo bagira ubwo bubobere n’amazi kimwe n’abo mu bihugu bigifite uwo muco. Guca imyeyo n’ububobere ni ibintu bibiri bitandukanye.

Muri rusange, ni iki gitera ibyishimo mu mibonano mpuzabitsina?

Ibyishimo mu mibonano mpuzabitsina bituruka ku bintu byinshi bitandukanye. Bimwe muri byo ni ubwumvikane, ukubahana, kumenyana no kumenyerana kw’abagirana imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Ubuzima bwiza bw’umubiri n’ubwo mu mutwe igihe cy’imibonano, igihe ikorewemo, aho ikorewe n’uko ikozwe n’ibindi byinshi umuntu atarondora na byo bigira uruhare mu gutuma imibonano mpuzabitsina izana ibyishimo bike cyangwa byinshi.

Icy’ingenzi ni ukumenya ko mu bijyanye n’ibyishimo mu mibonano mpuzabitsina nta kigero cy’ikitegererezo ku bantu bose igihe cyose.

Imibonano mpuzabitsina ntago ari ikintu kiri gusa mecanique (gisaba imbaraga) cyangwa se physiologique ( kijyanye n’imitekerereze n’imyitwarire) ahubwo ni na émotionnel (kigendera ku marangamutima). Ibyo byose bikoranye ni byo byagena ibyishimo umuntu yakuramo.

Mbese birashoboka ko umukobwa utaraciye imyeyo yaryoherwa n’imibonano mpuzabitsina, akanashimisha uwo bari kumwe?

Birashoboka cyane kuko nk’uko nabivuze haruguru, kuryoherwa ntibishingiye gusa ku kintu kimwe.

Birumvikana ko iyo ari ikintu wemera (croyance) kandi wibanzeho, ni cyo gifata umwanya munini mu byishimo ushobora gukuramo.

Mbese umuco wo guca imyeyo ni uwo mu Rwanda gusa, cyangwa hari ahandi uboneka?

Ni umuco uvugwa cyane mu Rwanda ariko si umwihariko w’Abanyarwanda kuko no muri Congo, Burundi, Tanzaniya, Uganda, Zimbabwe  urahavugwa. Wamye uhabwa agaciro cyane mu bihe bya kera ariko ubu ugenda ucika.

Mu bihugu by’I Burayi ntaho nawumvise no mu byo bigisha muri sexologie ntawo numvisemo mu buryo bwo gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina  bwaho.

Nk’umuntu ufite ubumenyi buhagije mu bijyanye n’imikoreshereze y’igitsina, mubona umuco wo guca imyeyo waba ugikenewe mu Rwanda rw’ubu?

Sinzi niba umuntu yavuga ko kera uwo muco wari ukenewe ariko bigaragara ko wahabwaga agaciro icyo gihe.

N’ubu bivugwa ko ugikorwa na bamwe mu bakobwa. Byose biterwa n’imyemerere y’ubikora n’inyungu yumva abikuramo. Ubushakashatsi bwimbitse ni bwo bwatuma iki kibazo gihabwa igisubizo kitarimo amarangamutima.

Dr Balisanze avuga ko ubushakashatsi yakoze ku kwikinisha ku kibazo cyabazaga niba hari ibindi bijyanye n’ibitsina, imikoreshereze y’imyanya ndangagitsina n’imikundanire mu Banyarwanda byifuzwa gukorwaho ubushakashatsi, ngo 2/10 mu basubije bavuze ko bakeneye kumenya byinshi ku gukuna.

Nk’uko bigaragara mu nyigo yiswe Plaisirs croisés: gukuna-kunyaza, Missions, corps et sexualités dans le Rwanda contemporain  Michela Fusaschi, ngo gukuna ni ijambo  riganisha ku busobanuro bwo kwambara, gufata neza umubiri.

Mu Rwanda rwa kera aho abagore n’abakobwa batambaraga imyenda y’imbere, Gukurura imyanya y’imbere (imishino) ngo byahishaga ubwambure.

Nk’uko abigaragaza mu nyigo ye, Michela avuga ko Abanyarwanda bahuzaga gukuna n’imyubakire y’urugo.

Byari itegeko ko umukobwa ugeze mu gihe cyo gushaka umugabo aba yarakunnye kugira ngo azamushimishe. Iyo yabaga atarabikoze, yarasenyaga kandi cyabaga ari igisebo ku muryango.

Gukuna byahabwaga agaciro karenze ibijyanye n’imibanire, bikinjira no mu myemerere. Abanyarwanda bemeraga ko kudakuna, cyangwa se kubikora nabi bituma ubutaka butera, cyangwa se bigakurura ibyago, nk’uko bigaragazwa na Michela.

Na ho umugabo we ngo yabaga yaravutse yambaye, ntacyo yabaga akeneye gukora kindi. Ngo ibi bigaragaza uburyo umugore yahoze akandamizwa n’umugabo mu Rwanda.

Mu gihe cy’ubukoloni, kiliziya gatulika yatangiye guca umuco wo gukuna, itangaza ko ari ukwikinisha.

Mbese gukuna byakorwaga bite?

Ubundi Gukuna muri rusange ngo byatangiraga umukobwa atarajya mu mihango, bigakomeza no mu bwangavu.

Mu Rwanda rwo hambere, nyirasenge w’umukobwa ni we wabaga afite inshingano zo kumwigisha ibijyanye n’ubuzima bw’imibonano mpuzabitsina n’urugo, kurusha nyina.

Ni na we wamwigishaga gukuna, akamubwira icyo bimara, akanamushyiraho igitsure amubwira ko natabikora atazashaka umugabo ngo bishoboke.

Gukuna byakorwaga igihe abakobwa bagiye kuvoma, gutashya, cyangwa se gushaka imyeyo yo gukubuza, ari na ho havuye “Guca imyeyo.”

Abakobwa kandi babikoreraga ahantu habaga harateguriwe kubohera imisambi n’ibirago “Mu rubohero”, umwuga ukorwa n’ab’igitsina gore gusa mu Rwanda.

Iyo bageraga mu rubohero, bicagamo amatsinda ya babiri babiri, maze buri wese agakururira undi.

Nk’uko ababikoze babitangamo ubuhamya, ngo iyo umuntu agitangira guca imyeyo birababaza cyane, ariko ubwo buribwe bukagabanuka uko imyeyo iba miremire. Ikindi nuko bikubanagaho ngo imyeyo ikure. Ibintu bamwe bafata nk’ubusambanyi cyangwa kwikinisha kw’abahuje ibitsina(gore).

Kuri ubu guca imyeyo ntibigifite ingufu cyane kubera ubukoloni, kiliziya, tutiyibagije no kutagira imiryango kwa benshi mu bakobwa kubera amateka mabi yaranze u Rwanda.